10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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