Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
