Someone shit on the floor
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
