dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
