There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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