K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Randomize
