The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
just found out that she named her cat after me.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
