She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
