oh god the rape fog is back!
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
