well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
