but the lizard people decide everything anyway
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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