well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
