Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
