dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
