WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
