Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
