So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize