I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
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