By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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