Texts From Last Night · caitlindisco's Favorites

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caitlindisco's Favorites Texts:

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(301): View more from Maryland

Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.

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(406): View more from Montana

She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.

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(970): View more from Colorado

I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.

(303): View more from Colorado

Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.

(508): View more from Massachusetts

i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.

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