I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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