I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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