p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
it's great music for shaving your balls
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
