I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
