His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize