Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
