Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize