quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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