awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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