I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
