i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
