i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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