If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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