i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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