summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
