how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
