Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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