i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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