you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
