happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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