I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I believe in your delicious
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
