I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
