Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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