Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
