omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
