Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
