thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Randomize
