Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
where are you?
Hypothermia
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Randomize
