Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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