She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
